Cigar Smoking Faux Pas
A faux pas is an embarrassing or tactless act in a social situation. Now we believe in a live and let live philosophy when it comes to cigar smoking. If you paid for the cigar, cut it however you like, light it with whatever you have, and so long as youโre enjoying the cigar, puff-puff-puff to your heartโs content. But during these coronavirus times, weโre here to illustrate what not to do when you return to your favorite cigar shop.
1. Mr. Touchy Feely
He struts into the humidor with the finesse of a white rhino. Saunters over to the shelf and proceeds to touch, squeeze, and sniff every cigar that catches his fancy. Rather than inspect from a distance and only touch the cigar that he is going to purchase, Mr. Touchy Feely nuzzles up to every cigar in sight.
2. Lick ‘n Snip
This is absolutely gross and unacceptable anytime, coronavirus or not. He has the cigar in one hand and the cigar storeโs community cutter in the other but just before cutting the cigar, he gives it the olโ Turner & Hooch! If youโre too young to get the movie reference, Google it. Dear Lick โn Snipper, a properly humidified cigar does not need to be licked before cutting. But if you must, bring your own cutter. Sincerely, everyone.
3. Puff, Puff, Give
Sharing is caring, but not when it comes to the โrona! Youโre smoking a particularly good cigar and you want your buddy to see for himself what heโs missing? Buy him one! Donโt give him a taste of your already slobbered on and smoked stogie. This faux pas has an obvious exemption; if your smoking buddy is also your wife, do what she says. Give her your cigar, credit card and dignityโฆ just donโt give her your corona.
4. Space Invader
This guy doesnโt believe in personal space, much less social distancing. So while youโre enjoying your cigar at your favorite cigar lounge, along comes the Space Invader to get all the way up in your grill. You can ask him to give you room but Space Invaders are like a bad rash. If they had the sense to back off, they would not have invaded to begin with.
5. Dipsy-Doo, Dunk-a-roo
Named after the beloved college basketball announcer Dick Vitale, this maneuver is the โdiaper dandyโ of offensive behavior. Youโre enjoying a cigar and fine spirit at your local cigar bar when out of nowhere one of your buddies dunks his cigar into your drink in an effort to improve the flavor of his cigar. If we hadnโt experienced this act of war firsthand, we wouldnโt believe it either.
Stay at Home
If you donโt feel well or are running a high temperature, donโt go to the cigar shop. Stay at home, get tested for COVID-19, and donโt come back to the cigar shop until a doctor clears you. And if you want some company while you smoke your cigar at home, listen to the Cigar Snob Podcast.
